In Loving Memory: Janet Howard

In the spirit of Christmas, CTC is dedicating ten days to honor and remember those who cannot be with us this season.

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In Loving Memory of Janet Howard

By John Howard

I REMEMBER

Realize I may have been given a gift
My words to express emotions I feel beyond this tight lip
Better left unsaid, sometimes I disagree with this
When it comes to fruition the creative process may be short lived
So I dig deep, need to release what’s captive
Within my soul even though my backbone might not be able to hack it
Push forward like a Captain
Strive for the best, and do not forget exactly what’s happened
Only question would be where should I begin?
Hidden inside so long not sure what could even be extracted
Memories must not dishonor, Heaven was destined
For the best Mother I could only try to explain how much we were all impacted
How we were all touched
How from Day 1 my Mother gave everything she had to each one of us
Loved how she hosted holidays and invited if you needed somewhere to chill
And Noodle soup was on tonight’s menu whenever you became ill
Made sure our front room floor was wall to wall with Christmas thrill
Homemade videos with no sound bright lights kept us all still
Neighborhood teacher when CPS would strike
And would work her ass off just so each year I could rock a new bike
Newest Jordan’s each time never knew how much it set her back
….Ignorant ass kid, deserved every damn time I got smacked
Supported every single sporting event I attempted
2nd Family to my best friends her kindness and passion was relentless

Now…I got a little bit older
Mom’s still a visionary except now the world’s a little colder
Don’t care, give her your problem she’d carry that shit on her shoulder
….Wish she had the power to move the upcoming HD boulder
Nevertheless, life’s becoming a tussle
But even with her added swerve she’d continue to battle her struggles
Helping raise grandkids she’d continue her hustle
Inner pains in her brain would begin to detain movements inside muscles
……Now is where id cut the mic
From Day 1 of diagnosis I NEVER seen someone with SO MUCH FIGHT
I NEVER knew someone who lived with SO MUCH LIGHT
BUT NOW I KNOW WHO’S THERE TO GUIDE US EACH NIGHT
Janet Howard…Thank you…Because now I REMEMBER
I REMEMBER to live life from JANUARY to DECEMBER
I REMEMBER to follow my pursuit of to happiness’ gates!
I REMEMBER to always allow entry for Family to my yards gates!
I REMEMBER to reach with a Peace branch like you
And I REMEMBER “to accept that what you cannot change John!!!!”
And “you have a large head to fit your enormous brain John!!!!”

….I cry…tears of pain because of her amount of suffering
Tears of joy…because I was empowered by an angel my entire life…
Now, WWJD: What Would Janet Do…She still empowers me because although times are tough sometimes with HD …I STRIVE to be like her…lol..one day I will…

WE LOVE YOU MOM…THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR BLESSINGS, UNTIL I SEE YOU.

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